Operative Liger
by APIII
Summary: Ever wonder how Naruto's obsession with the color orange would affect his life later on? Or how only one of the only regular jutsu's he knows is always used too hard for it NOT to be Naruto. Still, he'll probably do amazingly...right? Naruto Crack, no pairs.


ANBU: Operative Liger

Kakashi shook his head. To be honest, if Kakashi were to be as lenient as the 6th Hokage should be, he'd be fuming. But Naruto would always have a special place in his heart.

"Naruto. I'm demoting you. You are being stripped from the ANBU."

Operative Liger stiffened. Clad in the standard anbu flak jacket. Well, standard despite the orange stripes. They were NOT standard and they actually were forbidden, seeing as how they gave him singularity. Enemies holding grudges and all that. The metal arm guards and gloves having the Uzumaki Spiral etched into them were quite the controversial topic amongst the ANBU. The only thing that wasn't an issue was the mandatory ANBU tattoo. And the only reason that this is true is because the flames surrounding the tattoo had been done beforehand, conveniently surrounding where the tattoo was going to be put. They were soon removed quite efficiently by some random pink-haired medic.

"Hokage-Sama."

"Be quiet you. I want to hear your team mates report on the mission." The Orange Dragon squirmed as he turned to look at his partner, the cosmos having dubbed it fit to be the Snake.

Sasuke removed his mask, not that the dark hair didn't give it away his identity. With all of the paper work driving the former ANBU into insanity, Kakashi always saw Sasuke with the duck butt hair style he positively adored to tease, realizing that he may or may not have subconsciously cast himself into a genjutsu to see it so.

"Snake, you know the rules. This is far past the point other subordinates have been charged with treason." Kakashi said in a stern voice, showing he was truly dissatisfied.

"Don't bother threatening me Kakashi. If the dobe's leaving the ANBU, then I've lost all interest in staying." Sauske said in a monotone voice. To his utter surprise, Kakashi's sharingan flared through all of it's stages, beginning with a single spinning tomoe into two, then the third, finally ending with Sauske staring at his own mangeyko sharingan. He smirked when a small giggle was heard to his left.

Kakashi's harsh glare was then directed to the third person in the room, ANBU operative Pig.

"Is there something you wish to say Pig?" Kakashi had to give himself props for keeping up the menacing façade even when Pig proceeded to shrug at him.

"Hai Hokage-sama. Since these two seem to refuse being adults about the situation, would you like me to give you MY report?"

Kakashi couldn't help but sigh at the condescending tone. He propped his elbow down on his desk, giving up on keeping up the formalities bestowed upon a Hokage seeing as these three individuals refused to give him the respect he felt he deserved.

"Without the attitude Pig."

"Hai. The mission began without a hitch. We infiltrated the Warlord's main quarters without detection and Snake and I were dispatching the guards. One of the Warlord's inner circle noticed the lack of guards and immediately alerted the rest of the faculty."

Kakashi was actually quite surprised, considering this was in of itself a rare occurrence.

"Proceed."

With a bit of reluctance, Pig seemed to word her words carefully.

"Operative Dragon had…well…after being alerted and the majority of his guards incapacitated, the Warlord had taken a…woman who had been servicing him as a hostage. This is when several rogue Nin appeared, surrounding us."

Kakashi was hanging off of Pig's every word, wanting to see the point when the mission was derailed.

"Operative Dragon, well, dispatched a shinobi with a rotating sphere-like attack. Seeing the recognition in the other's eyes, snake proceeded to cackle hysterically as black flames began to engulf the facilities."

Kakashi gave a lazy look over at the still unmasked Sauske, mangeyko sharingan whirling in what Kakashi knew was an intimidating manner.

Sasuke's smirk seemed to grow the smallest fraction of an inch when he returned the gaze with a rinnengan and an equally impressive mangeyko sharingan. With a huff, he replied.

"What? They were enemy nin and besides, the dobe already blew our cover."

Kakashi sighed and pinched the bridge of his nose before closing his eyes and leaning back against his chair, motioning for Pig to continue, who threw her pink hair over her shoulder before giving a slight cough.

"Eh… I began to fight off several shinobi equivalent to Jounin, and in the chaos I began to start moving through rooms as my punches launched them into different sections of the building. Throughout it all, I did hear a fierce howling, before Operative Dragon shouted some obscenities at our target." Everyone stopped to look at Sasuke, who had made what some would call a giggle, which he obviously hadn't, Uchiha lineage and all.

"Obscenities? He yelled, You damn scum. I'm going to make a world free of bastards like you. Believe it! Before he threw a mini rasen-shuriken, which was exactly the size of the man's fat throat. The poor lady was screaming her head off….IT was epic."

Kakashi blinked at Sasuke, feeling that he was behaving a bit too much like a much younger and mentally unstable Kakashi.

"After this, we finished off the rest of the enemy shinobi." Sakura finished meekly.

"Naruto…Sasuke…understand that you are really limiting me on what missions I'm going to be able to send you to in the future."

Naruto sighed before removing the surprisingly resilient mask. Having replaced the fragile porcelain masks with the substance that Naruto had the sense of mine to scavenge from the battlefield in the 4th Shinobi War. He felt quite proud of himself at the time, managing to have found the small shard of Obito's mask in the entire reformed land where his second most epic battle had taken place at, no easy task.

"Yes Kakashi-sensei."

Kakashi visibly flinched, knowing Naruto only used the old name when he was genuinely sad.

"Don't be so put down Dobe. What was Kakashi thinking? You only have those two moves you created yourself. And not many people can spam a hundred shadow clones." Sauske said, trying to reassure Naruto, not realizing the compliment was double-edged out of sheer habit over the years.

"YOUR one to talk Mr. Susanoo! We were dispatching BANDITS, and that 100 ft monstrosity ended up making us fight warriors from WARRING clans for two days! They had made a peace treaty to take up arms against us for Kami's sake."

"Hn, yes. I remember the memory vividly. An exhausted Sauske cast me in Tsukuyomi instead of giving me an official report." Kakashi said furiously, remembering how enraged he had been when Sauske had forgotten to limit himself and he had to relive the battle for 72 consecutive hours.

"Don't you think you're in the clear here Naruto! What were you thinking!" Sakura said, managing to shift attention back to herself.

Naruto tried to apologize before he was cut off.

"I mean, seriously! You brought back that damnable saying. Believe it, you baka!"

"Naruto, Sauske, getting back to the important issue. You accept your punishments?

They both gave a short "Hai."

"Good, and Naruto, if you ever want this hat, you have to promise to never say that phrase again. Do you understand me?"

Naruto flashed a large grin, giving him the good guy pose oh so reminiscent of Maito Guy.

"Of course Kakashi-sensei. And I will be getting that hat one day, fucking believe it!"

Naruto and Sasuke shunshined to the Hokage Monument, before Naruto activated his 9 tails cloak simultaneously with Sasuke's Susanoo, before a giant chakra hand fistbumped a skeletal hand.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

"Excuse me Hokage-Sama?" A distressed Sakura said, holding a pig-like mask.

"Did I stutter, Pig?" Kakashi said, quite proud of himself for managing to think of an inside joke to share with his students. The job kind of sucked up the entirety of his time and he knew they could all enjoy this together.

"Didn't ANBU get to choose out of what was available Kakashi-Sensei?"

Kakashi looked up at her amazed. She only called him Sensei when she was trying to get her way, a decent ploy if Kakashi ever saw one.

"No, recently, I decided the Hokage should be naming the operatives as he see fits, for, ya know. Stuff."

Kakashi was too absorbed ignoring Sakura's death glare as he remembered his sensei's rather busty friend. Not the 5th Hokage of course, just another curious blonde with pig tails. He took a look at his Medic's chest, mentally assuring himself that 20 was an appropriate age to look at women so, before complaining to the Cosmos of just how cruel it was.

"Hokage-Sama, If I may." An ANBU operative said, stepping out of one of the many shadows that actually didn't seem to be in the seemingly well lit room.

"If you're trying to name people after their similarities to an animal," the operative seemed to gesture to all of Sakura, "like Pig here, then may I make a suggestion for our future roster of animals?"

Kakashi blinked at the ANBU, if he were to be completely honest with himself, he had yet to force this operative out of their mask because trying to assume their identity was basically the only real task he had done in the few weeks he had become the Hokage.

"Go ahead."

The ANBU gave a small cough. "What about a Liger and a Lego Brick."

Kakashi didn't respond as the wheels in his head began to grind, so Sakura spoke up.

"First of all, a lego brick isn't an animal, secondly, why a liger when we already have a tiger?"

"That's fairly obvious. Ligers because they have no genitalia, hence it's perfect for dickless. And the lego brick because despite Sasuke being such an asset for Konoha, he's still an annoying prick.

Kakashi slammed his head into the desk, moaning. Now he had to get a new past time for the next couple of weeks.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX No one ask me where I got this idea. I just always felt that the ANBU didn't do enough to hide their identities. Like Kakashi for God's sake, he was the only operative his height with grey hair! Then I got to thinking how Naruto might struggle to remain anonymous and It occurred to me that Sasuke and Naruto both have signature moves pretty much exclusive to them. Onto the topic of the hidden Operative…well, it's rather obvious who it is.


End file.
